gingerspeedster | Twenty First Race

Twenty First Race

[ Warden Filter ]

I'm curious. How many of you have kids back home? Or had someone to take care of, anything like that. I'm in a bit of a unique situation because when I first came here I wasn't even in a relationship, and now I'm married with kids, but I think it's done a lot towards helping my inmate. I'm not saying we should treat our inmates like they're our kids, but it's something to think about.

[ Private to David ]

Still grounded, kiddo?

[ Private to Drake ]

I was looking back over our old conversations, and I'd completely forgotten about that assignment I gave you. Made many friends yet?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Would you rather be working in the kitchen, washing dishes?

If it meant not being around Bourne, yeah.

You're stuck with Bourne either way, I figure.

Yeah. I know. 'Till he goes or I go.

You'd better get used to it, then.

Yeah. Guess I'd better.

It'll probably go faster if you listen to him, you know.

I am listening to him. I don't really have much choice.

You always have a choice. And you're making the right one.

It's not a choice. It's do what he says or I get small and furry again.

It's a crappy choice, but it's still a choice. And it's your choices that got you here.

Oh, great. Now you're giving me the oh-how-wrong-you-were speech. You don't understand. Nobody does.

I'll be honest with you, kid. I don't know why you did what you did and I don't get it. It's not in my programming. All I'm saying is that you had a choice, and the choice you made brought you here, to this point. It can't have been a very good choice if you're miserable with where you are.

That's just it, I didn't have a choice, any more than I've got one now. What was I supposed to do, let myself get bossed around forever? Sleep in a barn forever? Let them all look down at me and insult me while I risked getting killed for them? I don't care who tries to guilt me into thinking I was wrong, you, Bourne, whoever. It was the only choice I could make, and if I had to go back, I'd still do the same stuff. I'd just go after them sooner.

That's the thing, David. You did have a choice. You always have a choice. There may not be any good choice, or any right choice, but there always is one. Whether or not I agree with your choice doesn't matter. It's not my choice, it's yours. If you're happy with it, then fine. But you don't seem happy to me.

It doesn't matter if I was happy with it. It was what I had to do. Nobody gets that! I'm miserable because I'm stuck here with a warden who can turn me into a rat whenever he fucking wants to and stalks me wherever I go! A guy who's taken everything from me, and the one time I take something from him, I get stomped into the ground. That's bullshit, and I don't care if he's got a right to do it or whatever as a warden, it's still bullshit.

You're right, it is. Neither of you should be taking anything from the other. He's supposed to be helping you, and you're miserable, and that's not fair. But all you've got now are the choices in front of you. All you can do is try to make them count.

Why do you care about convincing me? You know I can't do anything to him. I couldn't even if I wanted to. He's got me right where he wants me, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. So what's this, trying to get me to feel better about it?

I know you don't want to hear this, but you're just a teenager. You've been through a lot since you've been here, and that's not even considering whatever you went through to get here. I want you to be able to graduate and grow up like kids are supposed to, not stuck here.

You might as well be talking to the Admiral or Bourne then, not me. They decide when I 'graduate'. And since Bourne's last inmate did nothing but help him and is still here... well, let's just say I don't expect to get home that way anytime soon.

They may decide when you're ready, but you decide how to prove it to them.

So I've just gotta 'prove myself' to the guy who turned me into a rat, a guy who I know has killed lots more people than I ever did, a guy who invades my privacy and knows everything about me but doesn't even tell me how old he is. That about sum it up?

Pretty much. Bum rap, huh?

Yeah, that's one way to put it.

Basically.

[Yes, David. He's watching you. And he snaps his fingers as if he's just remembered something.]

I figured it out. I realized why you bother me.

You're arrogant.

You're arrogant, and you have this sense of entitlement, and expect the entire world to just open up to you because of all the shit you've been through - and it has been shit. Well, guess what. It doesn't work that way.

And the worst part is, the easiest way to learn and get what you want is open to you, but you never take it. You never ask.

You never ask. You. Never. Ask. You steal, manipulate, kidnap, and torture, but you never ask.

You want to know how old I am? Ask me. You want to know how many people I've killed? Ask me. You want to know where I'm from, what my life is like, why I'm here instead of somewhere I'd actually prefer to be?

Fucking ask me.

Contrary to what you may think about me, I am not a mind-reader. I can't tell the future. And maybe if I'd known you were gonna be my inmate, I wouldn't have put you into a wall the first time we met. Because that made me an enemy in your eyes, I think. And you haven't let me out of the enemy column enough to realize that even if you don't like me and even if I'm frankly not thrilled to warden you, I am here to help you. If you have a problem - especially a problem with me - you let me know so I can fix it, goddamn it!

[Wow, he actually looks angry.]